Episode 11: Immediately After Birth: Complex Emotions + First Latch

The first hour birth is full of complicated emotions. Sometimes it's joy and bliss and love. And sometimes it's numbness, fatigue, and relief. And sometimes it's all of the above. Amidst the recovery, catching your breath after birth, and all the feelings: within the first hour or so is the ideal time to establish the first latch for chest and breast feeding. Today in Episode 11 of Brave Journey free weekly birth prep videos we're talking about the complexity in that first hour of birth, and the first latch.

So much of birth is unpredictable. Learn as much as you can before your baby arrives!

*Ever always: Do your own research. Talk to your medical care provider. Make informed decisions.

Full transcript: 

Hello, I'm Cara Lee, of Brave Journey and this is episode 11 of the weekly Brave Journey Birth Preparation Videos. If you're a regular viewer of these videos, you might notice this is a different background. I'm attempting to try to do this in my backyard. So I'm really hoping that the sound quality is okay

so, today we're talking about the first couple of hours after birth, and we're specifically addressing the complexity of emotions that can come up after birth, as well as the best way to get breast and chest feeding started, which is to get that first latch within the first hour of birth.

So for this video, we'll first talk through the first hour or two of birth in terms of emotions and how things might be feeling. And then we'll talk about that first latch, because it's all connected. It's all within that first hour.

So I mentioned this in a live a few weeks ago that there was something I really wished I had included in my skin to skin video, which is that not everybody.

When I talk about skin to skin, I talk about how fantastic it feels, because that's what it was for me. And that's what it looks like for a lot of people, but not everyone. So I wish that I had included the fact that some people immediately, after they give birth to their baby, do not feel bliss, do not feel joy, do not feel elation. They just feel relief or super tired.

So I'm going to turn this a little bit and see if I can get the lighting a little more steady. There we go. Oh, and then there's, you guys are getting to see this as a, a little llama that my kids play with, so I'm just going to tuck that out of the screen.

Um, So I wish that I had included this because the people who give birth and then don't feel joy or elation, or even love for their infant and simply feel numb or tired or fatigued. They feel like they did something wrong and they didn't, it's actually quite common.

So the intensity of giving birth, whether it's via cesarean or whether vaginally, it is so intense and there's so much work and energy having gone into it and often nights of missed sleep. So by the time that infant emerges, the, um, birthing person may just feel so depleted. Additionally, sometimes birthing people are in what we call "laborland" birthing people, especially. Um, I think that's a Birthing From Within term, which I was trained by Birthing from Within, and this idea of "labor land". This is altered mind state that you go into when you are in labor and it takes a while to come back to your body. It takes a while to catch up... for your mind and your spirit to catch up with what just happened with your body, which is that the infant is no longer in your body and it is now on the outside.

And that is just a completely wildly mindblowing thing. And for some people it takes a minute to catch up, so that's fine. So we keep the baby skin to skin, whether or not they're feeling love or joy or not, it still has the positive impact on the infant. And it still has the positive impact physiologically on the birthing person.

Now, in addition, We we give the, the, the, um, the infant and the birthing person time to, to come back to themselves and catch their breath. And this is all time, right before we start thinking about the first latch. So whether or not the person is in that altered mind state, whether or not they're feeling joy, elation, complete bliss with that infant skin is skin, or maybe they're still feeling numb or exhausted.

And they're just catching up with what just happened emotionally, spiritually, physically, and in their mind. No matter what we're still keeping that infant skin to skin. And then once the, uh, after a little bit of time has passed, at least within the first hour, we want to start thinking about the first latch.

So I really want to say I highly recommend before you birth that you either read a book, or go to a training or even best is go to a training or access an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant in your area, because what you want to have available, you don't want to have to be researching a lactation consultant if you happen to need them. Um, it's much, much better to have someone on hand before you've given birth. So I recommend you take a class because there's so much to know about breastfeeding and I will, I'm going to muster up the courage to do a video on breast and chest feeding. Like about more than just what I'm going to talk about today, which is the first, first latch.

And it's because I have some personal stuff around breastfeeding. Breastfeeding for me, especially with my first was a very, very, very, very challenging experience. And I still can't talk about it without getting emotional. So I've put off this topic just a little bit, uh, because. It's just, I gotta be able to put my stuff aside to be able to present good information.

Um, but today we're just talking about the first latch, which is easy enough. So if you've never latched a baby before to your nipple, it can feel either a little awkward or a lot awkward, but no matter what, it's a learning curve. It's a learning curve for the infant. The infant doesn't know how to eat and you don't know how to feed them at your breast or chest.

So there's a learning curve, no matter what, and awkwardness is to be expected. So. Hopefully, if you're birthing in a baby friendly facility, the nurses are trained to provide lactation consult support. I have been in baby friendly facilities where the nurse was still kind of useless. They were too busy. Um, so also consider a birth doula.

But for that first latch, make sure you're propped up. You're leaning back a little bit so that the baby is tummy to tummy with you. And you are propped up with pillows, pillows under your arms pillows under the infant. Just really lots and lots of pillows so that you can relax. And then you bring the, the infant to your chest. Rather than placing your chest to the infant. And this is for your comfort. So bring the infant to your chest.

And we're looking for a wide latch on that for that infant's mouth for that first latch, but no matter what, it's not going to be perfect. This first latch is not perfect. It's just really important for establishing breastfeeding that it happens within within the first hour.

But it doesn't have to be perfect. So if that latch looks narrow if the baby is latched like this, you can take your finger to their chin and gently pull down while they're latched to try to open it up. So it's a really wide mouth latch, which is more efficient for removing milk and also will help prevent, uh, soreness and damage to the nipples because the narrow latch is less effective and it can damage the nipple, but a wide latch that includes a lot of the areola can really be a much, much better latch. Hopefully, you've got a birth doula or a nurse helping you, but no matter what, you're going to feel awkward and it's a learning curve. And those first few hours just keep that baby at the breast. Keep putting them to the chest, keep offering them the nipple.

For the next few weeks. Um, nursing on demand, breastfeeding as much as possible those first couple of weeks will help you establish your milk supply. And, um, that's all I'm going to say on that today. I'll do a full video when I can muster the emotional courage .

That's all I had for today. Thank you so much for watching. If you'd like to receive these videos directly into your inbox, go to bravejourney.com and sign up for my email list. And I'd love to email you. I send a weekly newsletter with the link to the video and nothing more. And I also won't spam you or send your information, which I always say that because I see people saying they won't sell your information, but I seriously don't know how, but even if I knew how I wouldn't.

So go to bravejourney.com and sign up. Thank you so much. I appreciate you. I appreciate you watching this. Please let me know what you think. Any thoughts you had, any questions and, uh, what you thought about this outside setting. Can you hear me? Is this okay? Thank you. I appreciate you.